St. Valentine

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I can remember many Valentine Days when I felt inadequate, unpopular, and unloved because I did not receive a Valentine. No card, no flowers, no secret whispers or exclusive midnight toasts.

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Those were the days when I measured myself against a backdrop of 'couples-are-better and singles-are pathetic'. It's true that research bears out that individuals are generally happier when they are in a committed relationship (note: not just traditional marriage, however--loving siblings and best friends together, for example, also raise the happiness quotient.)

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On this Valentine's Day I have received two valentines that challenge the lovey-dovey commercialism of the Day and that touch my tender heart in the deepest and finest of ways.

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First:

You might wonder what I have done to deserve this sweet card. I wonder too, because this card is from the guardian angel home care companion who has taken care of my Mother all these weeks and months when jb and I could hardly keep things from crumbling around us. This woman--I'll call her "C"-- has been willing to juggle her schedule, help us out in any way we've needed, be so consistently kind and reliable I've come to think of her as family. Why she is thanking me says more about her than it does about me. But jb and I accept her valentine with a grateful heart.

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And a white envelope arrived in my mailbox today with this handmade knitted heart and a sweet 'Happy Valentine" card inside.

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It was not until I turned the card over that my eyes just about filled when I read the following:

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"I sent you the

one that was a

little misshapen

because I knew

that you would

still love

an ill-formed

heart"

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Oh N. I love you too, and I'm so glad we're friends.

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So, whether you're single or coupled or anything in between,

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY from my heart to yours.