. BAAHAAHAHABAHABOOHOOHOO!!
.
.
I am innocent!
I was only trying to show how to cry from your stomach while shaking your legs straight up in the air while crying and whining very loud. I was only charging three dollar bills or 18 carrots, which was a bargain price.
It is not my fault that one of the lessons took place on the keyboard of someone's computer and it broke.
.And it was not my idea to demonstrate the cry-from-your-stomach technique to certain animals who apparently decided to cry and whine all night and blamed ME when they got in trouble for waking up the whole street.
.I think Mitzy, Laurel and Jelliana are in for hard crimes. They look nice and they have offered me sugar free mints but I am waiting to see how much trouble I am in before I start sucking on candy, even sugar free candy, which by the way, I think, defeats the whole purpose of candy.
.
Why oh why am I the one who gets in trouble when there are so many rascals in the world and one poor little innocent bunny gets arrested for damage to property, disturbing the peace, ad soliciting without a license?
Don't tell my Mother!
.
Where is kj????
.
HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
.
Sincerely,
.
Emily Rabbit
Emily, have you met Lindsey Lohan yet? She's there too, you know. Just watch out for her *candy*,,,I wouldn't try any of that if she offers it.
ReplyDeleteYou must be very careful while you wait for KJ to show up. She will you know, doesn't she always? Sure, sure, you'll have to listen to her preaching,,but she'll get over it. If I see her around, I'll tell her that you might need some assistance, and to bring money.
PS: watch your back,,,you don't wanna mess around with Big Bertha!
Emily you are just in such trouble now - I don't know how to tell KJ about this she will be SO upset!!!! I think we'll have to wait till Marianne can tell her in person.
ReplyDeletebabs and mim, i cannot write back because i am only allowed ten minutes in the recreation room and i am spending it trying to get m & m's out of the candy machine.
ReplyDeletethanks for writing. but WHERE IS kj????
affectionately,
emily
Emily - see if anyone has a file inside one of their sugar-free mints. Then maybe you can saw your way out of there, just in case kj doesn't come post bail for you (and possibly Lindsay, too, although she has bigger problems than sugar free mints and computer keyboards). I hope you get out of there soon! Your friend, Pam
ReplyDeleteHmmmm, interesting that one of your cellmates is named Laurel. (I had NO idea my picture was being taken.)
ReplyDeleteHow did you manage to take a carrot in the cell? They should have confiscated it as a potentially deadly weapon because it has a point. Even the guards at the prison system sre slipping. They must have been previously employed as airport security!!
Emily, remember you get a free phonecall. You can still call 1-800-bailmyass to be sprung from the joint.
I have to go now because we have company here all week. It's not Marianne yet though. I'm very excited about her coming!! You'll have to come over when your best friend is here.
Keep your chin up! And maybe, just maybe you'll start making smarter choices one day.
Just sayin'...
xoxoxo
Lololo
OK Emily, I am working on a plan ... I've "borrowed" a very thick book called "How to Be A Model Prisoner". It is verrrry big and thick. I have hollowed out the middle and I think it still looks pretty much like a book.
ReplyDeleteIn it I have put a file, a small pick, a compass, phone card, rain mac, flashlight and of course some jelly beans to keep you going.
I was going to put in a sextant because I learnt that word recently and it is not at all what I thought it would be. If you are near water I will try and send one in another book.
The jelly beans are full-fat full sugar ones. Proper job.
I hope you get out before harvest time because business managers are not very good about doing actual work!
xx Jos
I should have saved my son's shirt for you - it has the phone number of a bailbondswoman.
ReplyDeleteOh, Emily, what did you do? It sounds like you might be in deep, deep trouble. Let me know if there's anything I can do, although I only have candy with sugar... I could bake you some cookies?! Keep you chin up! Love, Silke
ReplyDelete120 days or $120 rabbit. Pay up or cage up says the judge. This is your second offense and you do know about the three strilkes law right?
ReplyDeleteOh Emily! I am sorry for your troubles and if I were you I would follow Bab's advice and stay clear of Lohans "candy"!I am sure Kj has bailed you out by now or she will very soon.
ReplyDeleteLove and kisses,
xoxo
babs, but what if i took a vacation without kj knowing? do you think i would get in trouble for that? what if i have nail polish on when she comes to bail me out? how will i explain that, babs?
ReplyDeletemim, kj shouldn't be upset because this was NOT my fault and i am innocent. okay, i shouldn't have stuffed all those carrots down the jail toilet. i did not know it would back up.
yoborobosobo, i am still in jail. HELP! there is no sign of kj. next time i will remember to put a file inside a carrot. doesn't that sound easier than using the sugar free mints? ps i am teaching the women how to aim frozen brussel sprouts just right. we are using a substitute since there are no brussel sprouts in jail so far. \
lololo, that is NOT a carrot! that is the hinge on the jail door! will you call bailmyrearend for me? but lololo, that was not a nice comment you made about making smarter choices. BAABAAHOOHOO! just because i live life to the fullest there is no reason to arrest me, right? i am innocent!!!
when i get out, if you want, i will teach you how to have more fun if you teach me how to avoid jail at least sometimes
yours truly
emily
Emily,,,do you REALLY care? I mean really? (you know she gets over it pretty fast)
ReplyDeleteOh, and about that nail polish,,,just tell her you got it in one of your 'others'.
She'll know.
Ya know?
OH JOS! THANK YOU!! i will be rescued!!!! thank the bunny goddess!
ReplyDeletethe harvest should be great. but now i have to be careful i don't get arrested a third time, right?
i need your advice after the file works.
secret agent, a bail bonds bunny!!! i would laugh if i weren't concerned about my welfare. where is kj???
silke, YES, please send cookies!! do you have my address? write 'jail' on the package. what kind of cookies? i like carrotcake too. thank you, silke. i need my friends at times like this. please tell everyone this is not my fault!!!
mr.walking man, three strikes? WHAAAT? that is not fair!!! i can't promise i won't be back here, afterall. i would have to be perfect. i don't think i can. WAAAAAAAAH!!!!
annie, i am NOT bailed out! help!!
will i have to use my own money?!!!
kj is a mean lima bean.
yours truly
e.r.
Sending funds. Kj is not a mean lima bean, but maybe she wanted you to learn from this :-).
ReplyDeletexoxo
Oh, dear! Poor Emily...I wonder where kj is. I know she's a very kind hearted soul...she wouldn't leave you in jail if she knew you were there. So she must not know. Cry really, really, really loud, Emily, she might hear you.
ReplyDeleteI will send your jailer jelly beans, that always makes them kinder..