I took the top photo, in my yard last spring. The bottom photo is from an iPhone application called waterlogue. It costs $ 2.95 and it turns iPhone photos into different choices of watercolors. With a click or two, I am having a great time playing with this. I think it's damn awesome.
I can't seem to blog as often as I want. This means I can't seem to write as often as I want.
But I'm now hopeful. Today I finished a consulting report that took months. And for the first time since the holidays, since my knee replacement, since my Mother's move to a nursing home, since I left my therapy job--I have a clean slate.
Until further notice, and further notice will of course happen, it will be up to me to decide what I do. I have my Dr. Seuss rhyming story to shop around, my novel from hell to keep editing, my garden to dream about.
But I'm still unfamiliar with myself alone and with free time. I've aged this year: since the surgery I see pot lines and weariness on my face that I keep hoping sleep will erase. I don't move with my desired bravado. And, I'm thinking more these days about my life ahead.
JB and I will move to Provincetown when my Mother "goes." (A friend used that term and my throat caught when she said it). I hope (pray) for a closer relationship with my daughter and her family but I'm not sure how, and not sure if she even has time for that. I want published accolades, even when I wrestle with my vanity, I want that. I want a body that vainly struts, which is pathetic since I eat Boston cream donuts. I want to do nothing and everything.
I am in transition yet again. Anyone else?
Even as I write all this, I am at some kind of peace these days. I understand that kindness and gratitude honestly make things better; they make me better. I know knowing is currency for the days ahead.
Tomorrow, my first day without absolutes, I am going to talk to my friend Lori, finally, and then I am going to …..
I don't know.
(grin)
thanks for coming by.
love
kj
That app is awesome!
ReplyDeleteI am in the space between transitions, I think. Very similar to you, I have just (semi) retired and am pondering what to do with my new free hours.
My parents have passed, my body has aged and is transitioning, I have no novels to write. I think I would just like to go out and wander for awhile. . . if this weather would just cooperate. Sheez.
Ms 8, your time is coming :-)
DeleteLove
kj
Transition from good to happier sounds like what you disereve....I be in transition too...the best is to be seen
ReplyDeleteLove Chris
Oh happy day to hear from you, Chris. Want you and your words back!
DeleteLove
kj
start by reading something that you've been wanting to read for years. Then clean a closet, and take a walk......walk alot!!
ReplyDeletemiss you too.
Know what I did today , Mim? I queried. Well , I wrote queries. The publisher in Somerville closed for new submissions in December. Damn. And the publisher I like for 'the light stays on' requires 60,000 words and I only have 30,000. Damn :-)
DeleteSuch is the life of a ramblin writer
Love
kj
You're absolutely in transition ;-) Keep calm and go lightly. This statement I read somewhere.
ReplyDeleteIs the knee as good as new now?
Wieneke, I hope my writing floats to the top of my time. And I hope all this snow melts :-)
DeleteMy knee is pretty well. I can tell it's not MY knee but I've had a successful rehab. Still however problems that limit my walking--hip pain especially--and that is not good because I love to walk. I'm working on it !
Love
kj
Seems I am always in transition, not something I enjoy either, although it appears to be a constant in life. I love that app. for the photos.
ReplyDeleteDeb, try the app. It is easy peasy.
DeleteI want three months without crisis. Okay, maybe six :-)
Love
kj
Hello fellow wanderer! I am happy that you'll have more time for you. I think it's going to take a little while for you to find your groove. I"m still trying to find mine, with my mom passing and kids flying out the door and the old bod not cooperating with my mental image of myself - haha! But SPRING is around the corner and I am looking forward to pansies. xo!
ReplyDeleteHello Pam ! Where the heck is everyone?!
DeleteI think you are so right about finding a groove--not as easy as it might appear.
I will be planting pansies first thing. Can hardly wait cp
Love
kj
I love what the app does!! Magic ♥
ReplyDeleteMarianne, the app is so much fun. I'm using it with photos of my house so when we move I will have memories of now
DeleteLove
kj
I feel like I'm living in Transition these days. I don't really like it but since it's been that way -- one huge life change after another since Fall 2012, I've decided this must be my new normal. I do love that app too.
ReplyDeleteSouthmainmuse, I rail again the changes after a while; not that I can stop them but at least I can swear and complain. I hope you have a nice period of everything calm
DeleteLove
kj
Thank you, kj, for coming by mine.
ReplyDeleteLiving in transition? O dear me, I’ve done that for a long time now and still haven’t got anywhere that resembles terra firma.
Sometimes blogging my thoughts helps. Sometimes hiding them in a private place helps.
To see if you get there before me I shall follow you. I hope you won’t stop blogging just when you’ve allowed me to find you.
Follow me too?
Hi friko, glad to connect with one another!
DeleteI want a period of calm. I write better that way and I'm healthiest when I relax. I know life has other plans :-) but I know too my perspective has a lot to do with my well being
A day after I wrote this post, hell broke loose! :-)
Love
kj
Interesting app. When I used to have a Kodak camera, it came with a photo editing program that would change your photos to cartoons and such. Picasa has some neat effects, too.
ReplyDeleteThis is definitely a transition year for me.
Is picasa still around? Now that I have a Mac i use iPhoto. I wish I knew more about photography and painting
DeleteEnjoy your weekend!
Love
kj
When the man and the woman were expelled from the garden (as the story goes), the man turned to his wife and said, "My dear, we are living in an age of transition." Yeah, things haven't changed much. Except that time between transitions seems a lot shorter.
ReplyDeleteI do hope that you have a transition from restless to calm. And I hope that happens soon.
BTW, a new page of Facebook: California Avocado Commission. I keep thinking that Emily VV Rabbit had a hand in that. And if you find her, please remind her I have a small stash of jelly beans that I will share with her. When she gets to Canada.
Blessings and Bear hugs!
PS: Love the photo turned watercolour. I would like to be ably to do the watercolour part!
DeleteRob, that is a great point about the time between transitions being shorter. For me that is very insightful.
DeleteIt might be time for you-know-who to reappear. I am still not giving her bail money if she gets in trouble
I wish I could paint like this app. I think I will learn from seeing how it unfolds in front of me
Ps time for a dog, rob!
Love
kj
If you don;t give her bail money, will she rat you out? Something to consider.
DeleteI want to do nothing and everything. Boy can I relate. Transition is so unstable a feeling and even though we all go through it, it rarely feels good. Only after can we look back with 20/20 vision and hopefully say, "Yes, I learned something."
ReplyDeleteStrength and blessings dear KJ, and wishing you a bright week ahead. xoxo