Person A: "If I can't be spontaneous, I try to plan ahead so I can enjoy the anticipation."
Person B: I let things hang loose until they fall off".
Oops. If these are the words of two different people, which they are, they can either anticipate their differences and plan for them, or they can ignore their differences until they become a problem. Either way, one person will like the approach and the other won't. And therein lies a real or potential problem.
"Hey, how about lunch?"
"No, sorry, I can't."
"How about getting together next weekend?"
"I'm not sure."
"Ok, how about we come up with a time that will work for both of us?"
"I'm really swamped right now. I just don't know."
"Well, how about we plan a weekend trip for June?"
"That sounds good. But I'm not sure."
Lest you think one of these characters is either too pushy or the other one doesn't give a damn, or whatever else, here's a brief description of the situation:
Good people. Good intentions. Different styles.
What about your relationships? Has this ever happened to you? And if it does, or could, or used to, what the heck can be done to find a solution that works for both parties?
Note: Since I qualify on the grounds of being both a Counselor and an Imperfect Person, I've decided from time to time I'm going to write an ocassional post that looks at sticky challenges and issues like this. And since I'm blessed with such varied and intelligent blog visitors and comments, I figure it's sort of a public service to see who has what to say and why. So consider this Human Challenge # 1. .
What can be done when two good natured people have totally different styles when it comes planning (or not planning) ahead?