Wednesday, December 03, 2014



The word has meaning for me.

First off, I'm consulting again doing what I last did 10 years ago. From home, on my own schedule. Mostly I like it.

Next, for the last few weeks my Mother has been 'present' in our conversations only about half time. The other half, she's in her own world. This I don't like.

And then I'm juggling my strong love of these holidays with my desire not to stress. I'm not sure how to  coast into and out of making presents, spending time with family, baking cookies, hanging  lights, visiting friends, fitting in all that I hope for. 

And finally, I am writing a glorious (to me) book, lines and paragraphs and sometimes even chapters tucked into moments mostly when I have enough time. 

What does it mean to teeter in part-time? Does it mean I'm avoiding full-time? As in Full Time?

I could never complain. I have leisure moments far greater than ever before in my life. I have choices. Gardens. Books. TV shows.  Farms and oceans. And grandchildren. Children!

But sometimes I wander from one thing to the next, kind of sputtering instead of flowing. I know flow is important. 

And I'm not sure I have it.

Do you?



  1. Flow is overrated. If you can do what you love half the time, you're in a good place. After all, cleaning our rooms was not handed out as a reward, was it? Enjoy family and friends and don't do anything that you don't have to.

  2. Sometimes the flow seems to be flowing and sometimes not. As Rosaria said, it's about balance and becoming comfortable with the ambiguities of life. Sorry to hear about your momma - that must be heartbreaking for you dear KJ. I'm hoping you are able to enjoy the precious holiday season - I love your new photo header and am impressed by your baking skills - wowwow!

  3. Is that m&ms in a Rolo on a pretzel??? Who cares what else you're doing? You are already a success! Do more of this!!!

    I struggled a bit when I first retired and went to part time work. But being the structured person that I am, I solved it by scheduling downtime into my calendar. I make it just like any other appointment and I allow myself to do whatever I choose during that time. It may be work or gardening or reading or a nap or whatever. And because I've planned it, it still feels like accomplishing something even when I've done nothing. Because sometimes nothing is exactly what I need.

    I am sorry to read that your mom is declining. It must be very painful to witness.

    But I am happy to read about your book progress and especially your obvious joy it. I am anxiously waiting . . .

  4. Part-time; full-time; whatever. Do what you want, when you want. That is actually more difficult than it seems. The flow is one thing; drifting through one's days in something quite different.

    Blessings and Bear hugs!

  5. I've been lurching from one thing to another. Absolutely no flow these days. Miss you!

  6. Some days I have flow, other days not at all. It's just life. Take care and enjoy the holidays!

  7. Kj, I think it is all good, sputtering and flow, I love to putter, and flow. You do the best you can. Since all my money is going to a car (on it's way and I am driving a loaner which is such a blessing) I have nothing for the holidays to do except decorate my house, it is a blessing, no stress, but also a bit sad as I would love to be able to buy gifts and send cards. I will make the best of it though.
    Sorry about your mom.
    As for your post below. I am so sad about what is happening, can't put words to it, just deeply sad.