It had been twenty five years. She walked into the quickly planned reunion forty pounds overweight and without a haircut. The former meant she could not strut as she wished and the latter meant she could not spike her hair just so.
He greeted her immediately. "He" was the handsomest boy ever, at age fourteen, fifteen, sixteen: debonair and mysterious and soft and safe. He was equally dashing fifteen years later in California, hosting her and her friend for a week while she nursed a broken heart.
"She always liked you," her friend told him in front of her.
He shook his head. "Why didn't you tell me? I liked you too. I had no idea."
She shuffled back to then, her a gawky funny girl who had no idea either.
Later in the kitchen he smiled. "In California too..." His voice trailed off.
"I would have," she grinned.
"I would have too," he grinned back.
"Next time you're in town call me. We'll all meet for dinner."
"Yes," he said, "And next time you're in California, call me. I'll like to meet your partner."
Who knew? she thought. All this time I believed I was unattractive and maybe that wasn't even true. I wish I knew that then.
Ah well, better late than never.
So, so, sad. "I wish I knew" is one of the worst statements, ever. Heartbreaking just to read about it.
ReplyDeleteRob, the narrator wasn't sad. She smiled all the way home :-)
DeleteLove
kj
HERstory...I like it. Best to speak up really, isn't it?
ReplyDeleteYes Kay, but sometimes hard to do at any age; especially for a wee teenager :-)
DeleteLove
kj
I've lived this. Love your writing, kj.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Barbara.
DeleteOh damn....right?
:-)
Love
kj
Ah, a poignant scene. Herstory=great!
ReplyDeleteKiss kiss Lydia :-)
DeleteLove
kj
There is a reason for memory...so we can leave behind comfortably that which is behind.
ReplyDeleteOh mark you are such a wise guy accurate know-it-all.....
DeleteLove
kj
smiles....it is nice to know in the after, though that might make meeting once again a bit awkward
ReplyDeleteBrian, somehow I think these two win't be one bit awkward :/)
DeleteLove
kj
these secret longings, found out years later. it's always good, bringing a smile deep inside one's heart. how lovely — he sounds like a peach of a guy.
ReplyDeletep.s. looks like p'town was a blast!
You got this 100%, Amanda xo
DeleteAnd yes, he is a peach
Love
kj
Hind sight is always 20/20! You are beautiful. This was such an awesome post. So inspiring.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for sharing your thoughts. Thanks also for stopping by to leave me so joy.
Hugs to you beautiful!
Hello ms vee! I wonder if there was a boy like this in your 'herstory' :-).
DeleteA regret, yes, but a lovely affirmation too. :-)
Love
kj
Yup. I've so been there.
ReplyDeleteYup. Me too. Who knew?!
ReplyDelete:-)
Love
kj
Sometimes it seems like missed opportunity is papered with fear and assumption. We know so little. Why do we act as though we do? Self preservation. Pride. Blech! I wish I had none.
ReplyDeleteHa Annie! What I knew at 13 is that I was an asexual funny girl who did everything I could to glide over the fact that I was not as desirable as my 13 year old friends.
ReplyDeleteHis name is max. I think that adds to the story :-)
Love love
kj
What a story! And how beautifully written ... sounds like the start of a novel. And you are beautiful! xo
ReplyDeleteOh ooooooh you are here!!!
DeleteHere you are!!!!
You and I, who write and read but also get to listen. Thank you destiny!!!
Love love
kj
Kj, this is so sweet. I have been thinking about this stuff too, going through old photos of my mom and I, I had no idea how beautiful I was of how beautiful my mom was.I think now that when I am 90 I will look at photos of my this self and think the same thing. You and I still rock :-). xoxo
ReplyDeleteI know exactly what you mean, Annie. Old high school friends told me 'you look great; you haven't changed one bit!' And all I could say was 'I wish I knew that then.'
DeleteBetter late than never really does ring true
Annie, your Mom is beautiful. And so are you, inside and out
Love
kj
so many things that night have been twang our heartstrings.
ReplyDeleteall the things we never knew. like, in high school i never knew that probably if i had smiled instead of frowned i might have had some friends. ah well.
I think this is a lovely happy story - it made me smile. We're always rediscovering ourselves aren't we?
ReplyDeleteMum, I think you're right. Surprises me sometimes!
DeleteLove
kj
Hahaha mum mom Mim . Darn spellcheck!
DeleteShe's you, isn't she? I love your glass half-full attitude.
ReplyDeleteMy dear Andrea, I could never admit to being 40 pounds overweight and in need of a haircut :-)
DeleteLove
kj
Hi! These damn lungs of mine have been draining all my energy... I miss all you guys too:-)!
ReplyDeleteWander
Gosh Chris, I hope you feel alittle better every day. Lungs take time to heal. I'm still winded from pneumonia last winter.
DeleteYou are missed. Hang in ♥
Love
kj