On this Monday, I'm very late in posting the latest Thursday 13.
1. When I'm depressed or scared, I handle my feelings pretty well but my body prefers to feel drained and sometimes sick.
2. My improving back problem isn't good: I saw a surgeon a few days ago and he said I need surgery--this week!
3. I feel drained and sick about it.
4. I haven't had surgery since my tonsils were removed in kindergarten.
5. I have no real symptoms in the area where the surgery is needed but if I were to, it could be difficult to correct--thus the urgency
6. This unexpected event is occurring at a very good point in my life--another forceful reminder to 'ride the horse in the direction she is going'
7. The doctor told me I cannot dig holes to plant the grasses and mums that await me. I will resourcefully find a way to be a non-working supervisor for this endeavor but I'm not happy about it.
8. It is easier for me to talk about something difficult afterwards rather than during, but I am doing it differently this time. Good for me.
9. My fall plans include the resumption of my weekly writing class, a big yellow weekend writing retreat, a trip to the Almalfi Coast in Italy, Jess' baby shower, adding a gas stove to the new porch, seasoned wood in the fireplace, and getting this yapping book proposal and book out into the world.
10. I am going to trust that my fall plans will all work out.
11. My mind is pretty ingenious: as soon as I have a problem I didn't know I had, I immediately notice the symptoms. This works in reverse too: if I think I am sick, then see a doctor who tells me I'm not, the symptoms I've had disappear. Just like that!
12. This weekend jb and I were in spectactular Vermont--visiting friends on Lake Champlain. I hobbled abit but had a fully fabulous time.
13. In health matters, I tend to be an optimistic hypocondriac. Or a hypocondriacal optimist. (pardon the spelling?). Either way, I'd rather be digging holes. But I'm pretty confident I'll be alright. This is microsurgery: I'll be home the same day as the surgery (Friday) or the next day. I plan to keep my feet well-grounded in front of me......