Ode to FamishI can’t eat I’m on edge
I’m forlorn I allege
I can’t party, no cheese
Not even a banana tease.
All night I’ll be forced
To drink liquids and worse
All night I’ll be running:
My system is cursed!
Is it heartbreak?
The Asian Flu?
A wild tornado?
A hole in my shoe?
No no it’s not one
of those all-nifty reasons
It’s just a procedure
every five seasons.
Who could be mellow
When you have to eat jello?
I’m craving spaghetti:
My day’s a travesghetti!
A hospital johnny
I completely detest;
My indulges stricken
By a stupid old test.
Come on then,
Be done so I can eat candy
Finish up, hurry up
so I can feel dandy.
footnote: it's not a big deal and it's only routine. No food. No fun. Just horrible tasting liquid for starts. And a little out-patient hospital admission tomorrow morning. No need to be graphic: I'm sure you get the idea.
Don't ask me to borrow money tonight. I'm in no mood.
love kj
Hey kj,,,,have ya gotta buck you could spare till Monday?
ReplyDeletehaha, just kiddin'.
I think I know this test to which you refer,and it's nothing, as you say.
It's the prep that'll kill ya, hahahahaha.
Sorry, I got carried away,,,,I'm just so glad I'm done with mine that I'm giddy.
Thinking of you,,,,I make a mean spaghetti, or lasagne. Wishing I could send you some.
oh poo.
ReplyDeletehee hee. sorry. i'm feeling your pain times a month. at least. my nutrionist is evil. tomorrow you'll be relived. oops, sorry again.
:)
Oooh - that prep is the worst! (I had to do it over the summer.)
ReplyDeleteI loooove that you turned it into a poem - you are fantastic... seriously.
Wishing you an easy breezy tomorrow...
xo
Kristin
p.s. I don't think the last comment I left made it through... Just wanted to let you know that I think you make an adorable cat :)
O dear! Oh, my! Oh, . . . well.
ReplyDeleteDo hope things end well for you.
Blessings and Bear hugs.
I know of which you speak, and the stuff you have to drink is by FAR the worst part. It will be over soon, kj, and then it will be years before you have to do it again. xo!
ReplyDeleteThis poem just cracked me up. Travesghetti. :-) I'm in denial that I will have to get one of these ever.
ReplyDeletesending prayers to you as you proceed with the procedure. You are brave.
ReplyDeleteMy deepest sympathies.
ReplyDeleteThey tried to get me to do one and I flat out said NO! NO-NO-NO.....(yes I'm a difficult patient....)
Good luck today.
Food awaits!
XXOO~~
Anne
Hope the test goes well, they're always kind of a pain in the butt:)
ReplyDeleteLove the poem.
Lori made me laugh :-), I hope it all goes well. xoxo
ReplyDeletedon't you feel all clean???
ReplyDeleteBlech! Doesn't sound like much fun, but I imagine the scale will tip a bit lighter tomorrow. That's worth something, eh?
ReplyDeletebabs, haha back :^) its' over, all's well, and i would love your spaghetti or lasagne xo
ReplyDeletelori, you wise guy ever lovin imp :^)
kristin, the prep was horrible. the whole thing was horrible! and thank you, my friend, for the compliment. whether it's true or not,i love it. ♥
bear, i expected a more antimated comment from you. maybe bears don't have medical procedures? :^)
oh pam, that stuff was awful. i could barely sip it. poor poor me. over and done with. whew & yay. xo
cs, that part cracked me up too. thank you for noticing it hahahee ♥
ReplyDeletesuki, it sucked. i hated it. but now i'm glad it's over and done with; one less thing to feel guilty about. but i appreciate your sympathy, totally, and i offer you mine back xoxo
anne, see comment to suki. and i worked a normal work day yesterday, without realizing there'd be no food, only horrible i won't mention what. :^( & :^)
lilith, another wise guy you are! haha, thanks. i can't believe i have even done a post on this subject!! let alone eliciting comments! :^)
annie, lori made me almost spit out my sodium citrate or whatever the heck that liquid was. she is one clever girl. xoxo
Mim, NO! (♥)
annie, oh no, i started eating as soon as i got back home. first a peanut butter and marshmellow sandwich :^) i thought of you when i rhymed this poem and i thought i want you to see some of my (more) serious poems xoxo
I HATE that test and they want me to do it next at age 80. Are they kidding me? I will not make my little old lady eighty year old self go through this indignation. I refuse. One or was it twice now was enough!
ReplyDeleteGood luck with yours and glad you have such an easy attitude about it. I don't mind the NOT eating so much as the fullness beyond belief and the gagging after drinking nearly a gallon of that guck!
You will NOT believe this but my word verification is fulla!!! amazing.
Phew,Im thinking by the time you read this all that yuckiness would be long gone...So I hope your feeling better and your belly is full.I still love ya,even when your feeling cranky.Big Hugs,Cat
ReplyDeletelynn, i'm with you. the doc told me i have to do it again in five years (my Mother had colon cancer) but i'm not so sure about that! guck is a good word choice.
ReplyDeletecat, i love you too and i'm no longer feeling cranky. poor me for 24 hours. i can say that with true sympathy :^)
I hope everything came out OK!!
ReplyDeleteHave a great weekend.
marie, ahahaha! most definitely :^)
ReplyDeleteUgh. If it is the same test that I have to have every five years then I will not say anything to irk you right now! I had the first one done four years ago and was so so so sick from the godawful solution you have to drink to swish out every bit of anything you ever consumed in this life that I was violently ill. It was almost like food poisoning.....without the food!
ReplyDeleteVery cute poem, especially for one starving.
Lydia, perfect perfect description xo
ReplyDeleteI have been putting off that test for a long time. I almost did it, they called for a pre-op, and I chickened out again!
ReplyDeleteI'll take your poem in with me if I ever decide to do it, hahaha! Glad you're done with it! xx
Oh no what did they have to do to you???!!!
ReplyDeleteHope by now you are feeling better and are alowed to eat and drink normal again.
Take care
<3 M
O-Oh, sounds a bit colon-y!! At least you retained your sense of humour! Hope it's all over now and results are good.xxx LOL the word verification is 'oraffic'!!
ReplyDeletewhat a horrid event
ReplyDeleteit makes me feel quite 'spent'
although I do declare
when I look at that header there
I feel a lot of sheer cheer!!
Lotsa luck and not too many grrrrrs
oh and by the way, may I lend you some money?
Well I can only guess what it is. Hope it's all over and that the results were er, clear.
ReplyDelete