Not that I don't have reason to worry.
It's a fierce winter and pipes can freeze, roofs can leak, power can fail.
And I'm swamped by real estate matters: caring for our dream house in Provincetown in a blizzard, caring for our house here in Western Mass when we're there not here, my mother's house, should we sell it?, a little condo I bought as an investment years ago that now needs a new kitchen and new windows and a full makeover--$$$ I hadn't expected.
And the Income tax return for last year.
Re-applying and testing to renew counseling license.
I could continue.
It's a time of transition all right. Big and small and many decisions ahead. I am working and and I am yearning and trying to see my Jessica and the kids at least twice a month and I am writing a book.
And I should say I am going to the gym a few times a week, because I should be doing that, but I can only say that's barely half way true.
Still, last year I made some fine decisions for myself.
The biggest and best was to start living like a turtle. Turtle Living. This means I still get things done but I no longer let them overwhelm me to the finish, because I do a little here and a little there, sometimes more, trusting that in time I will finish. And I usually do finish. But I don't angst over the weight of the finish line.
I took care of the garden and the yard and the bills and my work assignments and my chores and my travels this way all last year and I've done fine. So I'm turtling my way through life, officially.
This morning I to my surprise have added another approach: living like a duck. Duck Living.
This means I do what I can, or not, when I encounter people or situations that upset me, but then I let the upset roll off my back, like a water off a duck. I am not (as often) holding on to stressful people or events, officially, as of now. I will be polite and forgiving to even difficult people, normally, but I'm moving on from stress or confusion if that's what's best.
I should probably include one other thing that seems to help me humongeously. Each morning, first thing, I spend at least 30 minutes sipping my coffee and reading the newspaper and sometimes just sitting, staring out the window. This sets the tone for my day. Unlike my old way of jumping right in to whatever greets me.
Finally, I am cooking and baking uncharacteristically. And I still feel good about my book. I'm writing and researching and organizing and forcing JB to listen to me read chapters out loud. I have a plot :^)
In a couple of months, I will know more about where I will live and when and why. I will know more about the role of $$$ in my life ahead, and whether or not I will lose the weight I shouldn't be carrying.
In a couple of months, I will still be living like a turtle and living like a duck. It works for me.
And I may add another animal or two.