Saturday, September 20, 2014

For Love….

Forgive me, Spirit of my spirit, for this, 
that I have found it easier to read the mystery 
told in tears and understood Thee better 
in sorrow than in joy.
George William Russell, 1867-1930


I get this statement and a good while back it inspired me to write this poem.  I modified and cleaned it up a little tonight. I can't say it's joyful, but I do think it's hopeful.


love

kj

For Love 
It’s only one arm,
Okay its dominant
But I can still
Raise broth to my frozen lips.

Only one eye,
The other choked blind
Though still I see shadows
Gracefully in flight.

I gave up my voice
So I could hear another
When the wires
Misfired and static reigned.

My steps though mis-shapened,
Hobble past space
Where molecular memory
Settles in.

Forgive me on a day
When my knees give out
And I whimper toward
Whatever grace isn’t.

When I was whole
I moved too quickly
To notice almost anything.
Now, lucky loss has given me sight.

My smile survived
because it double duties
With a tearful turn downward
At midnight, through the howls.

Yesterday I watched a cattail
Bend and balance
And I remembered when
My heart moved like that.

The loss of limb and love,
Lust and luster:
What a tiny price;
What a tiny price.

I wonder in the years ahead
Should my parts should regenerate
If I will miss
The space I’ve forfeited.

I wonder if sorrow
Might reappear as joy
filled with a love
That’s made me whole.

16 comments:

  1. My smile survived
    because it double duties
    With a tearful turn downward
    At midnight, through the howls"

    This stanza rang out to me kj

    ReplyDelete
  2. thanks, chris. how great to see you here

    this is my favorite:

    Forgive me on a day
    When my knees give out
    And I whimper toward
    Whatever grace isn’t.

    love
    kj

    ReplyDelete
  3. Look at the 7th line from the bottom.


    I think it better to be crippled and notice again what you saw when young, than to regenerate and have the possibility of the need for speed blind your sighted eyes a second tim.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. mark, my comment was just eaten #@@%$$&!! who says you have to speed through anything? hell, i'm mastering turtle living. and i'd hope for that in a regenerative skin too :^)

      love
      kj

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  4. good... thats love... sad and joyous :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. I have come back and read this many times today. Although I'm not sure what you are writing about here, it reminds me of the many gifts that cancer gave me. Losing part of me certainly changed my perspective and made me more present. Not what I would call joyful or hopeful but absolutely grateful for the many lessons learned.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 8, if you don't know, i am very glad to now know you here on these blogs. you get it.

      love
      kj

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  6. Maybe not even hopeful so much as mindful.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. cs, with every breath.
      (sometimes i forget)
      xo
      kj

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  7. this hits a chord with me lately. i recall a spiritual line that tells us it is only through our cracks that the light can get in.

    this is really beautiful work, kj. stunning.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. thank you so much, amanda. i think leonard cohen said something like that too.

      how are you? how is your writing? i have just ordered a new book called 'the paying guest' because i have to learn how to write love (making) scenes without being gooey :^)

      love
      kj

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  8. All very sad. A bit hopeful, but mostly sad. C'est la vie!

    Blessings and Bear hugs!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. life is sad, rob, as we know. but thank god, not just. there is also so much the opposite of sad.

      love
      kj

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