Friday, January 21, 2011

Money


Daddy, what do you do at work?

'I'm an accountant," my friend said.

"What is that?" the little boy asked.

"It means I keep notes about people's money and I help them add and subtract it."
"You mean you just write numbers all the time?"

"Pretty much," my friend said.

" Do you get to do it with crayons?"
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It's a new dawn here at # 9. One of us has had a cut back on work hours and that means a fresh look at income and expenses and that means cutting back and slashing through.

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It turns out I will have enough money in my life but not as much as I thought I would. I will have enough to enjoy a vacation or buy a new couch but not enough to spend mindlessly.
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And that's okay with me. I don't like having to look at our income and expenses but I don't mind it either. I've always liked the challenge of trying to figure how to manage money. I'm a forest person about it: I don't balance my checkbook and I don't nickel and dime anything, but I also don't let debt pile up and if it does certainly not without awareness.
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Here are some things I've learned or I think I know about money:
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1. I have a slush fund hidden in a paperback book where I add a $ 2o bill or two each month, whatever I can afford. I know that saving this way adds up. The most I've accumulated at one time was $ 2100, accumulated over probably two or three years in a ceramic piggy bank with no way to get inside besides breaking it in pieces. What a blast it was to crack it open and see all those $ 20 bills.
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2. I like the theory that says "Pay yourself first." That means when I sit down to pay bills, the first check goes to our savings account. Some times it may only be a very small amount, but 'pay yourself first' is a good habit to cultivate because of point # 1. :)
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3. JB and I may (often) spend more than we earn in a given month, but after many years of not knowing, we know when we are doing that. You can only know that if you can put a number to your monthly income and your monthly expenses. Information is Power. Even if you're spending $ 600 more than you have to spend each month, be honest: isn't there so value in at least knowing that?
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4. And speaking of value, my stint at an Ashram introduced me to the idea that that money should be seen as a spiritual practice on its own. It should be approached reverently, thoughtfully.
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5. This is how my business partner and friend Nancy handled her credit cards: 'I always pay the full amount of what I've spent that month PLUS the interest. So if I spent $ 300 and the monthly interest charge of the card is $ 25, I pay $ 325. That way I'm always reducing my credit card by at least something every month." Nancy died a few years ago, damn)
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6. JB and I finally set up two separate checking accounts: one to pay bills and one for the cash we will spend each month eating out, buying food and gifts, getting haircuts, etc. We don't mix the two. Not often but sometimes there is some lovely money left over in the bill account and often but not all the time we spend more than we gave ourselves for cash, but 1) we know when we've run out of spending money even if we're pouring a supplement from savings )and 2) we aren't tempted and don't use money needed for the bills.
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7. When Jess started working at age 14, I told her to spend 1/3 of the money she earned on herself, however she wanted; save 1/3 in the bank; and give 1/3 to a charity. I don't think she ever followed that advice, at least not precisely, but I do think the idea of it sunk in. I'm proud of her generosity.
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8. I have a credit card that gives me points I can use for hotel stays and airline travel. JB and I have at least 4 or 5 free nights somewhere a year doing that, including our free New York City stay in Times Square.
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9. When I didn't have enough money to pay all the bills I owed, I paid at least some portion of each bill. And I didn't close my eyes to figuring it out.
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10. Money isn't everything but it's really nice not to have to worry about it.
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I challenge you to add another suggestion or two. And just so you know, after that, I just might offer up that Sex Survey I've been talking about for too long now. :)
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Love
kj

13 comments:

  1. kj, I think you've about covered it all. And very well.

    I think it's important to 'treat' yourself occasionally. For me it's usually something small from the art supply.

    But I certainly applaud your #2 point.
    'Paying yourself first' (savings) is probably the very most important point, I think. Rainy days do happen, as does retirement.

    Excellent, thought provoking post kj!

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  2. I liked the previous post a lot too and hey KJ your kitchen is bigger than mine. I loved the space and the window. I have the window but not the space :) You like managing your money hmm I for one have been too careless with it and around it..so sorry if I dont leave any pointers of my own here but rather pick a couple for me own from here

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  3. babs, you are so right about treating yourself. money is to be enjoyed. what's a more important purpose for it than that> i should have said that clearly, so thank you. xoxox ps enjoy that space xoxox

    budh.aaah, i would like to know how old you are if you don't mind telling. i can't say if money because less important or more important as people get older. any thoughts?

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  4. I save first - always have. But I get the sweats talking about money. Not at work where I manage my budget admirably, but at home where I will cover my ears rather than talk about money. I truly hate it. And that said, since dad died I have had to manage the "family money" in addition to my own. And I still hate it. Absolutely hate it. Would marry an old billionaire just to get away from thinking about money.
    But no billionaires have asked and I just have to deal with it all.
    Good luck to you two, if nothing else - enjoy the reduced hours.

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  5. As the parent of two kids in college, and one graduating from high school, I almost hyperventilate at the topic of money. One thing that we did (when the kids were very young) is we made a decision to increase our savings. It was very hard at first, to go without that extra, but we got used to it. I always spend more than I plan to during the holidays, and now I am entering the 'lean months' where I try and cut back to make up for it -lol! Great post, kj! I hope this new situation means lots more writing time. :) xoxo

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  6. Some people can't save anything despite egregious efforts. And some people always save no matter how less the income.

    I like the money keeping inside the book and piggy bank part..it helps..

    My suggestion:

    Plant a money plant

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  7. The only thing I can add is listen to Ravi Shankur when paying the bills. Makes it so much easier to soar when being dragged down. But then what the hell do I know, the wife does all that and we are debt free to any long term debt. *shrug*

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  8. There's a lot of money going into our retirement fund every month. After that, I get household funds and Graham pays utilities and the mortgage. It seems to work, although at Christmas I close my eyes each time I hand over the credit card! So January and a part of February are spent paying off!

    I use points from credit cards as well...we've bought items for our home and have taken trips with points on those cards.

    This is a really timely post, kj, sounds as if you and JB are in complete agreement over money!

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  9. Interesting for sure and a topic many folks dont like to talk about.

    I have always not had much money and always been good with managing what money I had. I pay bills first.

    I buy many fun and useful items in thrift stores which gives me a sense of being a consumer but at just a few dollars a hit.

    I always pay of the entire balance on my credit card each month so very very rarely have an interest charge.

    In the past, if I had to cut expenses I would cut on food--not a good idea.

    I eat meals in restaurants very very seldom. Although I received a little inheritance and proceeded to buy books (my weakness) I have now had to cut back and return to my old days book thing of using libraries.

    the only clothes I buy new are underwear and occasionally a winter jacket. My current winter jacket needs an update to warmer and cleaner but I resisted this year yet again on buying a new one and wear the old.

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  10. mim, no doubt money is a metaphor for what ails us and what frees us. i don't know why i enjoy making it stretch and work, though i also understand the feeling everything could end just like that. i would trust you to handle anybody's money no doubt, but hahaha, you have enough to handle already! still, afterall, in itself it's only paper

    pam, we are generous with ourselves at holiday and vacation times. we do what you do: enjoy the ride and then keep an eye and catch up. i had one kid in college pam, and that took alot to figure. you are a saint. ♥

    shubhajit, you are so right!!! once above poverty, the amount of money is not as relevant as how people approach it. it's so true and we tend to spend what we have. we have more, we spend more.

    debt free? that is no small matter, mark. we mostly are too. it would be so easy not to be. AND, would i go into debt for a trip to africa or to help my daughter or surgery for stella? YUP! i think the trick is not to KEEP doing that as if it doesn't matter how high the debt gets.

    marion, it sounds like you and i have similiar approaches. it will take me until march to pay off the holiday shopping, and that is fine with me. i just keep plugging along. ♥

    suki, no cutting back on food! at least not on healthy food! i don't spend much on clothes either, books are my weakness too. but i'm losing weight and you know i'm an aspiring babe so i do want new clothes i like. i am so tempted to order from certain catalogues but i haven't yet. gotta pay off that holiday credit card first.

    thanks everyone. i love all these comments.

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  11. Unfortunately I don't have any good financial advices. I am more the type who needs them :(
    I always use to spend more then my income , but now every month I first put money for food in a box and Then I know I have the rest to spend.
    I am trying hard not to get in the red figures.......

    Thanks for these great tips.
    We all need them!

    ♥♥♥
    >M<

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  12. All of the foul language I know could be spewed at this point!

    I know YOU know how bad I am with money and reality. I'm not even going there.

    It doesn't help matters that every man I've ever had in my life sucks at the money thing worse than I do. Why oh why do I love them anyway?

    Good for you for having your shit and your finances together ;)

    xoxo
    Lo♥

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  13. I have a credit card with mileage points that I'm saving up to take a trip out of the country with. One of my big money rules is no debt except housing.

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