Thursday, September 24, 2009

Thursday 13: Influences

Recently I've been thinking about some of the people and events who have shaped and changed me. I'm an optimist by nature, and I'm generally a cheerful and fairly healthy person. The last year has tested me. But every day is getting better and I can see some of my humor and spunk coming back. And, for what it's worth, even my heart knows better than to second guess having loved in the first place.
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So this Thursday 13 is about people and events who influence me, large and small:
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1. Trader Joe's: Do you have a Trader Joe's near you? It's a unique discount grocery store that sells easy-to-prepare food that tastes as good as homemade. I buy chicken marsala, french onion soup, guacamole, artichoke dip, key lime pie and so many other luscious things that I am no longer cooking like I used to. I don't know if that's good or not, but man is it convenient.
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2. My new Apple I-Phone: I just got it last week and it's incredible. I can check my blog and my emails from where ever I am, the phone is easy to use, it has a great to-do list, I can check the weather, get maps, watch Utube, take photos, play games, etc etc. If you haven't seen the this phone, I advise you to check it out. Incredible!
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3. My family: I am blessed with a wonderful family. My partner JB and I have been together now 25 years (unbelievable). She has so many wonderful qualities, but my favorite is that she lets me be myself and she loves me. My Jessica now has her own family, including my son-in-law Mike and two wonderful little boys, and knowing she is loved and happy means everything to me. And my mom, now 93, is sweet and engaged and vibrant. With zero memory and 100% humor, she lives her life as fully as she can.
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4. Blogging: I don't read as much as I use to because I spend much of that time blogging instead. But I've entered a whole new world and I wouldn't trade a minute of it. Art, writing, photography, philosophy, love, friendship: it's all there for me. I've learned so much, I've fallen in love, I've become a writer. I don't think I would have written and published my first book if it weren't for my blog and my blog friends.
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5. Children: I did not expect at my age to have children so front and center in my life again. I did not expect I would love being around children so much. My grandson Mr. Ryan is so much fun I can hardly keep up with him. And at six months old Mr. Drew smiles all the time. I love getting to know him. Eighteen months ago I took a job as a Psychotherapist. I told the agency I could not work with children because I never had, but one thing has led to another I now have young"clients' of all ages, from 4 through 17. It's wonderful. I "get" them, respect them, care about them, and they know it. And they give me all that back.
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6. My Laptop: I can't live without it! I've become a writer on this laptop. And if my Internet is down for some reason, I'm like a caged animal. I probably shouldn't admit this so readily, but if you're reading this I won't be surprised if you feel the same way.
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7. Isabelle: That's not her real name and I am careful what I want to say. She meant the world to me, we failed, and my heart got cracked open. As time passes, I hope I will never have regrets, not even from the parts that hurt like hell. It pains me to know she looks back with contempt and distain, and I hope for both of us someday she and I both can be thankful for what we gave one another.
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8. You-know-who-you-are and thank you so much: She offered me friendship at a time when I was reeling. She mails me sweet cards, listens to my problems and joys, doesn't judge me, and thrills me with her art. Our birthdays are a day apart, we make each other laugh, and I think we'll be friends for life.
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9. My camera: I carry it with me almost everywhere now. I still don't know more than 'point and shoot', but I love taking pictures and I love sharing them. I love making cards from them. I love the creativity it affords me.
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10. Provincetown: It's a quaint 'anything-goes' town at the ocean's edge. You can walk one end of town to the other in less than an hour. It has art and galleries and freedom and weather and beaches and incredible light and restaurants and free love. I feel free there. I walk the beach and I remember that my life is good. I remember to be thankful.
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11. Dogs: I'm partial to dogs. I adore their loyalty and willingness to wag their tales without a single complaint. I wish I could rescue every dog on the planet who deserves a loving home. If I were to choose one thing to devote my life's work to at this point, dog shelters and rescues would be right up there.
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12. Writing: A couple of years ago if you asked me I woul dsay I was "becoming a writer." I don't say that anymore: I know, finally, I AM a writer. It's now in my blood. It's not something I can not do. I have to write. I want to write. I do write. I write stories and poems and essays and novels. I write about life and love and lessons and loyalties. All I ask of myself is that I improve and learn as I go along.
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13. My heart: It's not that I don't use my head and mind: I do. I'm good in a crisis and I know how to solve problems But I can be fragile and vulnerable and sensitive because of my heart, and sometimes that takes me somewhere that feels or hurts pretty deeply. But it's too late for me: my heart is wide open and I'm pretty sure it's staying that way the rest of the journey. Don't ask me what it means for me ahead. I can only tell you I'd rather open up than shut down.
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There you have it: thirteen influences. How about you? Anybody else want to share?
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xoxo

18 comments:

  1. Off the top of my head I have to say, nature, art and books and let me not forget cats!

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  2. This is wonderful kj, cathartic and interesting. I might save it for a rainy day when the block won't let me blog. Good to see you writing, happy and in the arms of an amazing partner and lovely family . .you're a lucky chook!

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  3. annie, all good...

    baino, thanks honey. you know i still struggle,it may stay with me a lifetime and i'm ready to accept that. but i know happiness is up to me. i'm glad we're friends, you know.... :)

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  4. #8 here, proudly being your friend.
    (Jeez, it is me, right?)

    yes, I do believe we'll be friends for life because that's how I treat friendships.

    Hey, #11 should be 'tails' not "tales." But either of them wagging would still be a good thing :)
    Don'tya hate it when people point out typos? Annoying!

    Your family is beautiful. How lucky you all are, honestly. Embrace that as long as you can.

    Last, hey....Ptown coming up girlfriend and we're getting together!!! Lobsta, creme brulee, what-the freak-evva! I had to put two 'v's' in there for east coast emphasis, know what I'm sayin'?

    all kidding aside, you rock KJ. You are pure heart and soul and we're going to be friends for a long time. Count on it.

    xoxoxo
    Lo

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  5. ms. lo, what makes you think i meant you? HAHAHAHA!

    get ready for ptown. get ready! i will be pulling up in front of your house and sitting on my horn as a background orchestra for when you strut out your front door and we put the top down on my convertible and let the wind blow our hair back and around all the way to chatham.

    okay, okay, i don't have a convertible. but some circumstances just cry for poetic license.

    ps you are a proofreader. put that skill on your resume. :)

    pss i AM counting on it. with squealy pleasure.

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  6. Is it cheating if I say my eyes and preferably behind my camera x 13 ... onwards & upwards Kj. Smiles*!*

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  7. Waking up breathing tends to start the day off with a positive influence for me.

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  8. It seems we've both been thinking about things a lot this week. I love your list - you are an incredible person, and I'm so glad you're my friend!
    :0)
    Hugs,
    Angela

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  9. What a wonderful share - heartwarming really. Thank you for doing this, since it made me reflect as well. And on another note, yes TJoe's is wonderful little spot with lots of goodies - have you tried the carmelized onion pizza? The key lime cheesecake is one of my favorites as well. =)

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  10. You write so easily and wonderfully! I loved reading this and your life looks like a wonderful place to be :) Love your new header!!!

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  11. I am thankful for health and influenced in my daily decisions because of issues surrounding same.

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  12. Great post. I must steal this idea!

    "With zero memory and 100% humor, she lives her life as fully as she can."
    I loved this line about your mom.

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  13. I might have a hard time winnowing it down to 13. But it is so true that even painful events can be powerfully influential, even for the better.

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  14. I love this ... I have been thinking of devoting an hour a week to blogging, to get back in the practice ... I might start with my 13 influences. Not only are you a writer, you're an *awesome* writer!

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  15. Influences,,loved reading yours, and seeing their portraits.
    And kj, I ADORE this artwork at the top. It refuses to be ignored too! Sometimes, on a really good day, I feel like that!
    I definitely think you would look like a Babe in a convertible.
    Get one.

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  16. annie, cheating is allowed even though you didn't cheat. how neat that you chose to highlight your eyes. i think that is wonderful.

    mark breathing and upright, or just breathing? :)

    angela, do i have your email? may i email you? i think we walk the same path... xo

    lisa, thank you for stopping by. i've now been to your blog and you are quite talented! i will be back and hope you will too.

    val, every time i'm reminded how good my life is i want to shout. 'yes but i struggle!' that's a habit i should probably break... xoxo

    mim, how true. health matters enormously, but there's also more of course.... xo

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  17. meredith, please DO steal this idea. i'm looking forward to reading that about you!

    cs, ha! i thought about limiting my influences to a half dozen. paintful events seem to open doors faster and wider, don't you think? i admit that reluctantly.... :)

    ms. melissa, i have been faithfully visiting your blog and find only disappointment. so i absolutely agree that you should blog at least an hour a week. so there. xo

    babs, you know, i hope you know that is not my artwork. it's a card i found and couldn't resist. do you want it? because i think it has your name on it.... especially since you are encouraging my quest to become a babe. i want a vw convertible. lime green.

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  18. This was a fabulous post! I would have several of the same things on my list and yes, I can say that finally I am also a writer...it is a great feeling isn't it and blogging makes all the difference in the world. I'd love for you to come and check out my sight.

    Congrats on being published!
    much love

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