Monday, May 18, 2009

Animal Wednesday: Free at Last!

Illustration by Sudio Lolo


CHARGES DROPPED AGAINST DEFIANT RABBIT


Boo-B00-Hoo-Boo-Hoo-Hoo-Boo-Hoo.

I am still crying. I'll tell you why at the end.

It pays to have friends in high places. There I was in jail crying and kicking my feet in the air and pounding my paws on the ground when kj showed up and paid $ 50 to get me out. But she gave me dirty looks all the way home and she is still complaining that I shouldn't have tried to sell my rabbit pellets at a church meeting in the first place. I think she is wrong but I didn't say anything because I felt just a little bad that she had to leave her dinner party to come to the jail to pay my bail and then she had to drive me home and pretend she was not 100% mad at me so I wouldn't cry even more.

Then Ms. Bella said I was a minor and she would tell the police I was mentally incompetent.
.
And Ms. Renee said I should have told the church people I was there for a same-sex marriage (which rabbits don't ask permission about: rabbits do what they want) (at least that what my mother says).
.
My best friend Marianne told me to go to San Francisco and sell my pellets to a lady with a shopping bag and sore feet, knees and back (the lady, not the shopping bag).
.
Chewy said I should sue for man handling (rabbit handling) and Sonia, Deborah Kay and Babs gave me business advice about how to make money selling my pellets.
.
Bimbimbie suggested I threaten that I was a rabid rabbit.
.
And lololo directed me to call 1-800-bailmyass.
.
All of these ideas were very nice. I didn't listen to any of them (yet) because kj said the police and the church will drop the charges if I say I am sorry and promise not to solicit in any churches anymore. I agreed to this when kj told me I would not have to pay back the $ 50 if I gave her the beautiful mandala my best friend Marianne sent me. She really likes that mandala. So I agreed and then I talked to lololo on the telephone and told her I was a happy rabbit again and she asked me how happy.
.
I told her I was so happy I was jumping up and down throwing flowers in the air. lololo told me I sounded jubilant. Then she painted how I felt. After having to put up with kj's sketches of me for all these weeks, isn't this the cutest picture of me you've ever seen? Don't I look jubilant?
.
Because that is why I am crying again. BOO-HOO-BOO-HOO-BOO-BOO-BOO. I am crying because that was very nice and very sweet of lololo, and I am crying because there are very nice and very sweet people on these blogs. And even though I still want to make money and definitely should be paid for writing this every week, I like knowing so many nice and sweet people. I like it so much it makes me cry.
.
The next time I get in trouble, which will probably be by the 4th of July, I know I have friends in high places. So first I will cry sad tears and then I will cry glad tears.
.
Sincerely yours,
.
Emily V. V. Rabbit

19 comments:

  1. Hello... I'm so very happy that you took the time to visit me and say "Hi" as now I know where you are..... and I'm now delighted to be here
    :-)

    best wishes and I look forward to visiting again.
    Ribbon

    PS very cute rabbit!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Coat your pellets in chocolate and offer to sell them for a fund raiser...what church could not forgive a brash bunny who is willing to raise funds?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Happy to meet you! Thank you for visiting my little corner of the world. I have had quite a delightful visit here in your corner. I will most certainly be back again. **blows kisses** Deborah

    ReplyDelete
  4. Emily...

    I cant see your new picture by LOLO due to firewalls at work. I am able to read your post. I will look at the picture tonight and comment on your new look, Imagine LOLO did awesome job.

    Ok sounds like you learned a lesson this time on emotional level, business level(choose the right marketing spec...apparently not churchers), a new number to call from LOLO..(that was hysterical), and marriage advice.

    I am quite fond of KJ and you(because ur the rebel)...and I smile everytime I visit yall. (ok too mushy time to move on).

    I give you a week and you will be causing havoc and rebelry. But I enjoy the antics and live vicariously through your posts...

    I think you should write a book of your adventures...

    Smiles,
    Sonia ;)

    ReplyDelete
  5. ribbon, i'm equally happy to see you here! that picture of you on your blog is just adorable. i'll be back for sure.

    deborah, here's some dancing kisses floating to your little corner of the world. i look forward to getting to know you. :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. mr. walking man, that is a wonderful idea. but do you think i will get arrested again because the pellets are not really "food"? you know, like, what if little kids eat them and throw up?

    sincerely,
    e. rabbit

    ReplyDelete
  7. OMFG I see the picture...stupid ass firewall screwed up and I could see it....You look awesome Emily...and jubelant....Ok my spelling sucks I know I know...but screw it...Im a artist..I leave the writing to KJ she is the poet of words.

    Smiles,
    Sonia ;)

    ReplyDelete
  8. ms. sonia, kj says you are a very interesting person who would be fun on vacation. and that you might be an imp too. you shouldn't stop being mushy because i just love the compliments and i could hear you say nice things about me for a whole day or even a whole year. but ms. sonia, i didn't learn any of the things you mentioned. i still think those stuffy church people should buy what i sell and i am only a little rabbit so i don't know anything about marriage and besides what did renee mean about same sex? oh, i did learn something about marketing, but you do think walking man's idea about chocolate pellets is good? i don't want to get arrested again for at least two months.

    yours fondly,
    emily r.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Emily Rabbit at this point I wonder if you feel best about being free or having your portrait done by the divine Ms. Lolo.

    So happy you are free.

    xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  10. Dear Emily,

    It's so good to see you happy...JUBILANT even!!! I think you ought to high-five everyone so they can have an Emily heart-shaped paw print on their hands ;)

    So do you really think you're going to behave for the entire month of June?? I think there may be too many temptations out there. After all, you're a rebel with a cause ;)
    I've always been a rebel. Girl (bunny) after my own heart!

    xoxoxox
    Lololo

    ReplyDelete
  11. Emily, you are one lucky wabbit to have a personal portrait done by ms lolo - wowee!

    The moral of the story is....

    I forgot.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Jumping for joy with hearts on your paws. (smile) What a wonderful paw-trait.

    ps thank you for correcting my words to "rabbit handling"... I should have chosen my words better.

    ReplyDelete
  13. ms. renee, do you think i should pay lololo for my picture? i never thought of that. because i think that picture might make me famous, so i would be glad to pay lololo
    $ 2. do you think that's enough?

    lololo, i would like if we could get in trouble together. i'm sure i could whine our way out of anything. and lololo, thank you for the picture. would you like me to pay you? because i think that picture might make me famous...

    ms mim, you forgot the moral of the story? hahahaha! that made me laugh. i like you. you are a lucky wabbit too.

    chewy, do you need an editor? i could help you for $2, if i need $2because i think that picture might make me famous, that is, if you think i should pay lololo for my picture. she is an artist, you know.

    pretty sincerely,
    emily

    ReplyDelete
  14. Yes, that is the cutest picture ever :-). Glad you are free. Love you silly rabbit. xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  15. Superb drawing, KJ, just superb!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Oh Emily This portait does you more justice! Love it!
    Glad all turned out ok again!
    Good to know for you you have friends that get you out of trouble then it is easier to get into trouble the next time.
    But please not on the 4th of July, that's my birthday......
    Take care now and enjoy your freedom!

    ReplyDelete
  17. Dear Emily,

    I love giving things away, especially to rebellious, outrageous rabbits, so there's no need to pay me!
    It's just nice seeing you jump for joy ;)

    And yes, I'd love to get into trouble with you one day!! I know we will soon ;)

    xoxoxoxoxo
    Lololo

    Oh look, word veri is Emrabbit!!
    (Just kidding! Inside joke)

    ReplyDelete
  18. Hi Emily, had a visit from your cousin Harryhare overnight. He seems to be on a similar mission judging by the number of pellets he left behind. No notes of demand have been found ... yet.

    I do hope you haven't started some sort of international pyramid scheme Emily ... it will cost KJ more than $50 to rescue you if you have*!*

    ReplyDelete
  19. yes Lolo has marvelously captured your mood... and that jump has some magic about it... it tells that you can do anything you want... no one can resist you...

    so just go on Emily... just go on...

    ReplyDelete